Wednesday, April 10, 2013
She becomes reborn.
Novels inspire me to confront or change things in my own life. So do things other people say to me. Years ago a woman in an Al-Anon meeting pointed her finger at me and blurted out, "You have no faith." Damn. She was right. And it's an area I still struggle with, although I can pull it off more days than not.
Recently, a colleague and fellow coach said to me, "Pick one, Casey!" I'd been lamenting that I maintain four different personas in my life -- a coach, a quilter, a contemporary writer and an erotic writer. My attention was splintered, but I was afraid to let one go and lose the income. (See...there's that faith problem creeping in again.)
I was a horse-crazy kid and one saying I remember about horse-jumping from that time is "Throw your heart over the fence and the horse will follow." My heart is in my writing. The more I write the more I find myself reborn. I'm remembering dreams and hopes I'd had before the world took a good hard swipe at them.
Every day I work on reaffirming my faith. The view from my window, the critters that entertain me, my deep friendships and darling husband help sustain me. I know where I'm going.
No, I haven't picked just one yet! But I'm rearranging priorities, putting more time into writing and developing a career path. There's a long delay between writing and income and this change is definitely putting my trust in the universe to the test.
I believe its worth it.
What about you? Do you have a dream that requires a leap of faith?
Casey Dawes writes and quilts overlooking the Clark Fork River in Montana. Her latest book is Chasing the Tumbleweed.